Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Fashion Review - And how to artfully rip it apart...

This is a damned movie review. When I say damned, I mean damned. I'm reviewing "Fashion" by Madhur Bhandarkar. By far one the worst movies I have seen till date. I like movies that surprise me a little, not too much , just a little. This movie was so damned predictable, that I was predicting the dialouges in the movie, let alone the story, about an hour before I even entered the hall.

The film is essentially about Meghna Mathur a small town girl with big city dreams in the modelling and fashion industry. Hmm how brilliantly original. She gets everything wrong in the begining and slowly learns the ropes of the industry and gets to the top with her "do whatever it takes attitude". On the way to the dizzying heights of her supersensationalism she manages to overthrow the present queen bee and "it" girl,... whatever her name is, who's busy on her own downward spiral of coke abuse and ego trips. All the while, the protagonist is being manipulated by her boss for sexual favours and la de da la de da.

The erstwhile queen bee with a coke habit gives the protagonist and ominous warning that she wouldn't even recognize herself after she reaches the top. And then finally the protagonist goes on her own downward spiral betraying her friends and backstabbing people, all the while developing a healthy coke and alcohol abuse, like a good supermodel should, finally till she gets the boot by her own talent company, a la the erstwhile queen bee. Finally she goes overboard and gets high in a party and ends up with a one night stand with a black dude.They're always the most lucky or the most unlucky people in movies, they either get the babe or the bullet, but no matter what they always remain cool, and look cool.

This apparently was the turning point in the movie, after she gets her jollies with Mr. Anonymous Black man. She goes into depression and runs back home to small town to mom and dad. Dad feels like rubbish for not supporting dear daughter and coaxes her to go back to big city where she falters initially in her comeback and yet manages to pull it off all the while trying to nurse back the erstwhile beauty queen who'd been battling with addiction and ruined herself. Trying to validate her life I suppose. In the end she faces all odds and triumphs. Huzzah !!

Now to what was actually wrong in the movie.

The director thought everyone who went to the movies were imbeciles and felt the need to spoon feed every aspect of the movie by first person narration.

Also the script had a very middle class slant to it. Not something which the artsy farts in the movie who were depicted would approve. What my complaint is that many people have actually benefited from the damned industry. God I'm defending them in an effort to rip the movie whats the world come to ??

Plot was way too linear.

Too less skin. I had quite some expectations.

Karan Johar's cameo. Why do we deal with him for anything at all. Can't he just have a freak accident and die.

Did i mention it was predictable like a sunrise.

Did I mention a waste of time and money ?

Okay I'll stop. Contact me if you want me to continue.